More Catch up!

The House party- a celebration of Mintcake, Ireland, Dude and Shimmey's new place.

Shimmey: WHERES MY PAIN?? *runs madly around*


Later


Shimmey: IM SO ANGRY....IM GOING TO MAKE AN ANGRY WRAP TO EAT

Shimmey goes to have an angry rant to Library boy and Ireland. Ireland is very uncomfortable as Library boy is naked under the covers.


Next morning
Shimmey: I have no idea where my window pane went...
Snoise: wait a minute is that what you were talking about when you were shouting about your "pain"?
Shimmey: yes. I took the window pane out so I could unlock the door for some reason.
Snoise: ooohhhhh I thought you were doing your usually drunk emo thing running around asking "wheres my pain?"

***************
M- Dogs Birthday/ Goodaids, Snoise and Terry pub trip

Txts:

Snoise to Faceboy (at M-Dogs bday):  Terry requests that someone photographs Enigma's ginger beard so he can see it. He also says that "he bums wetherspoons"
Enigma: Faceboy is a wanker. That photo is apparently my face when tired and blinded by bright lights.
Snoise: what photo?
Snoise: oh that photo
Enigma: DAMN for a second was really hoping it hadnt sent.
Faceboy: What do you think of Enigma's beard?
Snoise: Snoise " its quite ginger", Terry "I'm distracted, in the photo hes making a sex face", Goodaids "its quite straggly". Goodaids and Terry also add it reminds them of Rumplestiltskin.

Faceboy: Also we may have already killed M-Dog
Snoise: pace yourself!
Faceboy: Me! M-Dogs the one nearly vomitting in the toilets!
Snoise: I meant pace yourself in feeding M-Dog shots.
Enigma: Four guys in a X university toilet....manic times were had....slightly traumatised.

Faceboy: Huge's new nick name is "the onion"
***
Pub with Snoise, Goodaids and Terry


Terry: lets think of chat up lines! "oh Faceboy...you are like a winters rose...so distant...non existent and unfuckable"
Snoise: I'm so going to text him that!
Terry: NOOO Snoise! your not allowed a phone!
Snoise: I'm putting that in the text too.

text reply from Faceboy: im insulted. "unfuckable"?
Snoise: he means distant and unavailable
Fb: tell him thanks in a very sarcastic manner.
Snoise: so shall I correct him and say that you are not distant and unavailable to him?
Fb: No I am to him...but not to others.

Terry: So I have a question for you. If a tree falls in a deserted forest does it make a sound?
Goodaids:No
Snoise: yes
Terry: ok next question. You are on the phone naked and the other person is also on the phone naked, is it weird if neither of you knows about it?
Snoise: as long as no one says that they are naked in the conversation its not weird
Terry: ok but then if someone is stalking someone else is it weird as long as noone knows about it?
Snoise and Goodaids: Yes!
Terry: But is that just because of our cultural values and our perspective? In another country they may think differently.

Terry: I want to write a screen play! The main character shall be called Lady Vagina Tutesheets and the villain Baron Bajazzle!
Goodaids: That sounds like a Mills and Boon novel
Terry; Ergh, they are all the same!
Snoise: how many have you read!!!??
Terry: two... there were no other books in Cornwall!
Snoise: thats as bad as Bushhead's excuse for why hes read the Twilight series twice.
Terry: but he was in Lincolnshire, thats closer to civilisation than Cornwall!


***************


Terrapin and Snoise talking about Made In Chelsea
Snoise: I have alot of sympathy for Caggie. Everyone kept going on about her and Spencer as if she didn't have a choice in the matter!
Terrapin: Girls arn;t meant to have a choice! They are meant to look pretty and say yes at the right moment!....Oh wait that sounds quite bad doesnt it?

The Summer

Hey guys and girls! Its been a while hasn't it!!! Sorry for the silence. Some of the gang have moved on from university life and have been pushed into the real world (myself included).

Here's a quick catch up to what people are up to.
- Huge, Faceboy, Snoopy, Enigma, Brittany and a few others are still rocking the university life, causing trouble and mischief.
- Goodaids, Shimmey and Snoise have graduated and got themselves real jobs and everything, however temporary and badly paid some of them maybe its almost like their proper adults. Goodaids and Shimmey even have their own places!
- Ireland, Mintcake, Shimmey and the Dude have moved into a new place near uni so can still join in with the shenanigans over there when they want a break from the real world .
- Terry is sleeping alot and attempting to avoid employment to the degree hes considering applying for accountancy to get his parents off his back.
- Bushhead's travelling around South America.

So thats the gang!

But thats not what YLATT's about, so heres some quotes and anecdotes from the last couple of months!

*************************
WC's 21st Birthday- The Aftermath


Snoise walks into the living room where she was planning to sleep alone with a few others. The sight that greets her is Shimmey sitting entirely topless on the sofa with Bushhead, Enigma, Huge and Snoopy looking uncomfortable around the room.

Snoise: what is going on??!!
Bushhead: Shimmey was getting changed and then she sort of gave up half way through
Snoise: Shimmey put a top on!!!
Shimmey: Why should I? being naked is fun. My boobs are great.
Bushhead: Please put a top on! here you can have my hoodie!

Ireland then walks into the room. She has taken off her corset leaving only the transparent top she had underneath.


Snoise: Ireland! you need to put another tshirt on!
Ireland: But I'm wearing a tshirt!
Snoise: one that isnt see through! Here take mine, I'll put another one on *Snoise takes off the tshirt she is wearing and hands it to Ireland. She is left for a moment just in a bra but then finds another shirt*.
Ireland: NOOO IM WEARING A TSHIRT

*Shimmey is finally persuaded to put Bushhead's hoodie on and goes to sleep under a pile of sleeping bags. Bear comes in looking for his sleeping bag and goes to drag it off Shimmey*


Snoise: I would'nt do that! shes just gone to sleep!
Bear: but i want my sleeping bag! *Bear drags the sleeping bag off her moving all of her coverings revealing Shimmey asleep facedown wearing only a hoodie and quite revealing underwear*
Bear: Ahh! that was a mistake.

Later

Bushhead (to Snoise): Although you were in your bra earlier I still think you win the award of "Most Dignified Female in the Room"

Huge: I went back to the Marquee to get something and found Ireland asleep under a table and we had to sort of drag her out from under it

**********************
Shimmey, Snoise and Terry's trip to the V&A.

Coming out of the V&A
Shimmey: what shall we do now?
Snoise: sit in a park?
Terry: With wine?
Shimmey: YES!

Shimmey and Snoise share a bottle, Terry has one to himself. They then go to Snoise's friends Birthday celebration at a 2 for 1 cocktail hour.


Shimmey (to Snoise): Shall we get 2 for one?
Snoise: yes lets get some thing Mango! Terry, do you want to wait 5 minutes, then there will be an even number so you can share with someone.
Terry: NO I can just have 2 myself!

Later
Terry (to Snoise's friend Leslie): CHEERS MAN, Cheers! *attempts to clink glasses but just drops his pint*


************


To be continued

I just want you to be happy.

Txt conversation
Shimmey: did you hear from that guy?
Snoise: nope, however  D sent me a random message
Shimmey: Go for him. From facebook stalking he seems good.
Snoise: I cant "go for him" its just a very casual, slightly weird facebook message.
Shimmey: Opportunities are for the win
Snoise: that made no sense! are u drunk or with company?
Shimmey: I just want you to be happy

phone call
Snoise: I can tell your drunk just from key phrases and the intonations in your voice. Your pretty coherent though
Shimmey: CALL ME TOMORROW WHEN IM SOBER. You have to call me so we can talk when I havent drunk so much vodka! We'll have a catch up. Make sure you call me.

The next day
Snoise: heya!
Shimmey: ummm hello?
Snoise: you dont remember telling me to call you last night do you?
Shimmey: ummmmmmmmmm

They held me down and stripped me!

Snoise is with friends in Edinburgh, also finding time to catch up with Goodaids and Dribbles.


Dribbles and Snoise walk into the girl Snoise is staying withs bedroom. Ps flatmate is standing there reattaching her bra.
Flatmate: sorry I was just showing these guys my nipple piercings! *they look at the bed to see P and other friends looking half amused half shellshocked*
Dribbles: ummm hi, nice to meet you

********
Snoise meets Goodaids and her friends at a pub for a drink. They are playing I have never.
Girl 1: i have never been pissed on and enjoyed it
Girl 2: damn it! (drinks)
Girl 1: i have never stolen anyones boyfriend
Girl 2: damn!
Girl 1: and whose boyfriend was it?
Girl 2: yours.....


Goodaids: do you know whats really funny? *points to the man and woman in their late 20s sitting across the table* we dont actually know them! when we came into the pub there were no seats so we kinda crashed their date and forced them to play I have never
Girl 1 (having noticed the man has come back with 2 shots): who buys shots on a date??? (turns to the girl) watch out hes trying to get you drunk
Girl 2: I have never had my date crashed by 8 people..... and loved it!
Man and woman look nervous
Girl 2: DRINK UP THEN


**********
Snoise meets a boy from Cambridge. Oxbridge snobbery in a club. 


Boy: oh your from the inferior place...
Snoise: sorry i thought YOU said you went to Cambridge. so which college are you from?
boy: X college
Snoise: so not one of the famous ones...
Boy: which one do you go to?
Snosie: W college
boy: oh so not one of the famous ones then...

***************

YLATT head to M-Dogs place for a party.




Snoise: you know Bushhead and Shimmey just left you by the toilet, you took yourself to bed. no one knows how.

Terry: WELL LOOK WHO'S AUTONOMOUS *does small dance*


*********
Truth or Dare
Snoopy is dared to give Shimmey his clothes. He is at first enthusiastic about stripping off but becomes increasingly embarrassed sitting in his underwear. Especially when M-Dog's dad appears to take a photo.


********
20 mins later
Shimmey runs through the corridor past M-Dogs dad dressed in just a sheet. Enigma walks into the room wearing a dressing gown.


Bushhead: what happened?
Enigma: THEY HELD ME DOWN AND STRIPPED ME
Shimmey: well I had hidden my clothes as I put Snoopys on so I put this sheet on while I gave his back but it turns out they found my clothes and moved them.
Enigma: they have also hidden my shorts. With my Iphone in them.


*************
Bushhead: i have an idea. you swap an item of clothing for an equivalent item and keep going
Eg.  Snoise swaps her jacket for Mint Cake's, Bushhead swaps his shirt for Huges. However due to the rule you cant swap your most recently gained item it keeps escalating.


Snoopy to Snoise: I want your shirt
Snoise: really?? Oh fine (hands Snoopy her crop top)
Snoopy: WHAT EVEN IS THIS? HOW IS THIS A SHIRT?
Snoise: ewww sweat patches. ergh.


eventually amusing things happen such as Snoopy being dressed entirely in Shimmeys outfit and Snoise and Shimmey looking butch in mens clothing.


Shimmey: Iv run out of things to swap! I know! Snoopy, my bra for your shirt!
Shimmey then later attempts to swap her shirt despite not having a bra before Snoise persuades her to get her bra back first. Faceboy being the first to gain back all his clothes becomes the winner. 


Later
Faceboy: does anyone know how to get chocolate out of hair?
Snoise: what happened?
Faceboy: well we were playing with malteasers...
Snoise: wait so you have a malteaser stuck in your hair?? how is that even possible?



***************
The next morning


Snoise walks into E and Snoopys tent at 5.30 as she couldnt sleep and was hearing voices.
Snoise: I heard voices you guys arnt sleeping right?
E: no, come in its fine. Im just educating Snoopy in Classical music

Snoopy: Faceboy is passed out. There was a hole in his blow up mattress so he decided to sleep with his head over it to stop it deflating.

Snoise and Enigma are sitting looking miserable on the stairs
M-Dog: you guys ok?
Enigma: I may throw up
Snoise: I may make myself throw up
Library boy: is it ok if I do that before you do?


Next YLATT gathering is mid september, sorry so short of updates!

Up yours Enigma

Shimmey fb status;
"someone please just hand me a job on a plate; and maybe some money and a house too...?"
10 minutes ago · Privacy: · Like · 


Enigma; oh, so not bored, just moaning....again...you're not going to moan on the bus tomorrow about your hangover from tonight are you?


Sh; up yours Enigma. you know i just like moaning


E; O_O not sure you meant to write exactly that..." 


Sh; Shit
Haha that's actually hilarious


Text
Engima; did you just delete your posts
Sh; maybe
E; shame
Sh; lol
E; haha


Fb
E; "brightened my day, that's for sure" 

Buried Alive

The gang all head to the beach for Enigma's birthday. 

His present...to be buried..

on a stone beach

top of his flip flops

Mrs Bennet

An evening with Snoise's family




mum: shes just faking, she definately doesnt have chronic depression
Snoise: how do you know, you a counsellor, you not being very sympathetic
mum: when i was there the other day she had a cold and didnt get out of bed.  I had a cold AND a sore throat AND i couldnt breathe AND my back hurt and I went to scotland

mum: you dont want to end up like your aunt, 56, toothless and single
Snoise: she lost her teeth in an accident!
mum: but she hasnt fixed them yet has she. you need to marry someone to take care of you. you should marry that friend of yours! the one with the job! he definately likes you! I can tell from your facebook photos
Snoise: what are you talking about??
dad: we dont have to marry her off just yet
Mum: im not saying we should marry her off. I wouldnt mind if she had her own home and toy boys ...or girls or something...but was financially secure
Sn: STOP INTERFERING IN MY LIFE. I know who you remind me of! Mrs Bennet. soon your be wearing bonnets, boasting how il be married by spring and wailing for your smelling salts!
Mum; EXCELLENT. THIS SOUNDS LIKE A GREAT IDEA. I will wear eccentric clothes and be crazy
dad: you mean you dont do that already?
mum: and I will take to my bed and complain constantly to make you all take care of me?
dad: you mean you dont do that already?
Snoise: I dont think youd enjoy this comparison so much if you reread the book. Mrs Bennet is very embarrassing. Like you. I definately wont introduce you to anyone until I actually am going to marry them
Mum: but you dont give me anything to speculate about! at the moment you could be marrying the cat or the heron and thats it.
Snoise: thanks mum.


****************
dad: I used to get the bus to selfridges, wander around then buy a big slice of fresh brie from the foodhall and eat it on the bus home.
Snoise: how old were you?
dad: thirteen
Mum: and there...you can see the sort of boy your dad was. the sort who went to selfridges and bought brie.

**************
Harry gets home
Harry: wheres MY food??
Dad: ummm....you were late
Harry: but where is it??
Dad: umm...I ate it
Harry: all of it?
Dad: yes.